Chronicles of a Late Bloomer

I forgot all about bullets! I love bullets so much. Welcome to my bullets.

• I gained 25 pounds in the month leading up to visiting my parents’ house. This is no small feat, and was accomplished almost entirely by eating for comfort rather than eating for nutrition.
• I bring this up because in the lead-up to taking my license exam on Monday, it’s become really important for me to nourish my body correctly. I know it’s my brain that will be doing most of the work, but I worry about the impact of a carb crash, lethargy from not sleeping well, or fatigue from having to sit in one place for too long. I can’t afford a chocolate migraine on the day of the exam. I can’t afford to have an upset stomach or a burrito coma.
• What I’m trying to say is that it would be awesome to be able to have this kind of focus and drive for every day of my life. I am a pretty amazing person. I do incredible and important work that I love. I am a good, honest woman and I take extreme care with my relationships. Really, my day-to-day life is important and impactful. Wouldn’t it be great it I worked this hard to show up for it every single day?
• So, sue me. I’ve been watching that new show, More to Love. The thing is that it’s not that much more ridiculous than other dating shows, except for the mindset of the players. I remember feeling the way some of those girls do. I’m sorry if it sounds harsh or callous, but once you’re on the other side of it (not blaming your weight for every single thing that has gone wrong in your life), it really seems sort of pathetic and silly. The fact is, there are skinny girls who have never gone on dates or had a boyfriend or been “treated right” in relationships. There are plenty of single skinny women, divorced skinny women, kind skinny women, and bitchy skinny women. Really, my weight is just one of the things in my life that I have control over.
• PS: I date a lot. I date a lot. I went on a date last night. I was dating a guy for a while that I really liked and will probably date again. I have really outstanding relationships with people who are still my friends, and I go out with some duds. Really, lots of men are more interested in what I have to say or what I do with my life than what size my jeans are. I am saying this, people, and I live in Los Angeles — national capitol of plastic surgery and eating disorders. Where all the models and actresses live. I have a very satisfying love life, lots of sex, and genuine hope of finding a permanent partnership. All of this, and I weigh 300 pounds. Suck it.

This entry was posted Thursday, August 6th, 2009 at 5:37 pm and is filed under Uncategorical. You can leave a response, or trackback from your own site.